I have a lot of stuff to do.
I have to edit a wedding.
I have to prep for my MA presentation for Thursday.
I have to write my MFA Thesis paper and correct my art for submission.
I have to WORK on my Thesis exhibition.
I have a lot to do. More that I haven’t listed.
But I have a lot on my mind.
This year has been incredibly hard on my heart.
Maybe slightly physically, but more so, my compassion I suppose would be the correct term. My empathy, my understanding of the world, and my compassion have been challenged.
I am a patriot. I am an American citizen. With that being said, I will say our Country is in bit of a crisis (and when I say a bit, I mean a fucking huge crisis).
My art is, and about, idealized bodies that are unattainable. However, my work is turning into political art, which I started to do on the side, and will be expanding in May.
I am the most depressed, the most angry, the most upset I have been in my entire life. This fires me to fight, to be strong, and to value other’s lives more than I value my own. With this also comes acknowledgement that I am a white twenty-some year old female, and some may not think I should speak about their issues, or fight along the sides of people who have it much worse than me, when in speaking in terms of freedom. I do not complain about shit that other privileged people will seek. By this I mean, I acknowledge my ‘step-ahead’ lifestyle that I have had my whole life, without even realizing it due to my skin tone. I do not need a month to celebrate me, because I have had freedom since birth.
This makes me more mad than anything.
I began to lift weights about 7 years ago, and began to really lift heavy weights about 5 years ago after I was domestically abused by someone I shouldn’t have been with in the first place. Then, it was aimed at fighting men. Today, it is about fighting for others. I hate that because we were born a specific way it has entrapped us in either privileged living, or bound failure. In the area I live, I feel judged constantly because my body is covered in tattoos, which makes me completely humble to think about other races within this same context.
I can’t wrap my head around this hate going around.
I can’t wrap my head around this administration that NOTHING is actually being done about.
I can’t wrap my head around people voicing their sexist, racist opinions as if it were okay. It’s not okay. I don’t even know why these still exist.
I can’t wrap my head around an administration purposely trying to destroy a good economy.
And finally, I cannot actually understand, like I literally CAN NOT understand, how people are still in support of this buffoon in the office.
We are in the age of the most accessibility to information, yet people are unwilling to research. People take the words of a liar and paint them true. I cannot, understand.
The cherry on the cake for my depression, is animals within the world right now. Everyday I see terrible videos of mistreatment, and if there is human mistreatment there is no way it’ll get better for them.
So what am I doing?
In May I will be fully dedicated to two things. 1. My friend is actually in the running for congress for Michigan, Nick Schiller. Incredible dude, and seriously lower middle class, and educated. So I’m following him around a bit and helping campaign and photograph. 2. All of my fine art work is going to become political, as it is in the background right now. I’m excited to release these pieces.
Starting at the end of this month I am working with Barn Sanctuary and will be volunteering and photographing / videoing for their non-profit which I am really excited about.
It’s time to stop bitching and doing more than I already was.
It’s time to fight, y’all.